


(here are two) reasons to come back

by benwaitingforsolo



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Blow Jobs, Cooking, Daddy Kink, Eventual Smut, F/M, First Order Corporation, Fluff, Food, Forgiveness, Grocery Shopping, Light Bondage, Oral Sex, Parenthood, Pregnancy, Protective Rey (Star Wars), Rey is an engineer, Rey is pissed, Reylo babies, Romance, Sex, Single Parent Rey, Single mom Rey, Slight Anxiety, Smut, Stress, Texting, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Unplanned Pregnancy, ben deserves it, but we still love him bc, clueless ben, he's also an asshole, single parent, who tf knows what ben does
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:00:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24842659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/benwaitingforsolo/pseuds/benwaitingforsolo
Summary: On the day of Ben's college graduation, he left and never came back. At Rey's graduation, Ben sees what he's missed out on for the past two years.Rey has raised the twins with help from her friends and family this far, is it time to let Ben know?-originally named "reasons to come back"
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 215
Kudos: 335





	1. sounds familiar

_Curse those beautiful genes of his._

Beautiful genes that included _twin_ genes from his mother and uncle. 

She had dark hair and dark eyes, like her father. 

He had freckles and radiated warmth, like his mother.

She was resourceful and loved affection.

He was smart and had a short temper.

Despite never meeting their father, Rey could see him in them. Her twins. Her freshly one-year-old twins, Mae and Bail. 

They'd never be alone. They will always have each other. 

At least, that's what she thought, two years ago. 

**Two years ago**

Rey excitedly stood next to Leia and Han, waiting to meet Ben after his college graduation ceremony. 

Ben was at the top of his class, graduated summa cum laude, and with merits that could get him a job anywhere he wanted. Anywhere. 

But he was undoubtedly set on working at First Order, based in downtown Chicago. After his summer internship at the company and mentorship from Andrew Snoke, Ben was offered a high-level position for when he was handed his diploma and stepped off the stage. 

Rey, on the other hand, had two more years left until she graduated. But it didn't matter.

Han spotted Ben first, walking next to Armitage and Phasma, Ben's friends from the internship. "Ben!" Han yelled, waving his arms over his head. 

Rey's eyes never left Ben as he walked towards the group. He looked dashingly handsome in his dark black suit with his stark white button-up. She was the embodiment of the 'heart-eyes' emoji, all because of him. 

"Hi Dad," Ben greeted, with a manly handshake. "Mom," he bent down to hug Leia. "Rey," Ben said lovingly, before lifting her and spinning her around.

"Congratulations, love." Rey lilted. "I'm so happy for you."

Instead of responding with words, he replied with a strong, hungry kiss. 

The two heard Han and Leia murmuring at the side. 

"Alright, lovebirds, we have a reservation to get to." Han teased, dropping his hands on Ben's shoulders. 

Dinner with the Solo's was typical. Han pressed Ben by asking, "You still want to work for that raisin of a man?"

"Yes, Dad, Snoke is a smart man, and he has a plan for me there."

Han groaned, mumbling on about how Ben should be working with Lando.

Leia pried into his and Rey's relationship. "How much longer until I can start planning for a wedding and some grandchildren? We're not getting any younger here, kids."

"Mom!"

"How did the move-in the condo go, Ben?" Rey asked carefully. 

Sharing an apartment had been a dream. Mornings consisted of snuggles and love-making at sunrise. The evenings brought romantic trysts and candlelit dinners. 

"Smooth," Ben answered dryly. "Probably filled with dust by now. I haven't been there in two weeks."

Rey didn't want to be alone again, and she wouldn't. Her, Rose, and Kaydel were moving into a townhouse near campus for their junior year. Ben has just become a staple in her life; this change was something she had been dreading since last summer. 

_I can come to visit every once and a while._

_He'd come over during holiday breaks._

_We'd still see each other._

Ben and Rey stumbled upon the stairs, arms around each other, tipsy from the drinks at dinner. 

"Do you have to leave on Friday?" Rey whined, kicking off her heels and flopping on the couch. "Can't you just stay here with me?"

Ben sobered up quickly. "Yes, sweetheart." He answered roughly from their bedroom. "Snoke wants me to start on Monday." 

Maybe it was the wine, but Rey felt hostility from Ben's voice. He hadn't even started the job, and he was defending it like his position depended on it. Rey apprehensively walked through the hallway.

"You've known about this for months. You came with me to pick the apartment." Ben spat. "I'm moving to the city and starting my job at First Order."

"Okay, okay. I get it." 

"No, Rey, you don't. I saw you agree with my Dad when he talked about working for Snoke."

Now Rey was sober.

"He sees my potential. This is good for me." Ben stripped angrily, his hands ran through his ebony locks multiple times. "I can be someone other than the son of a senator and a general. I can be my own person."

Rey took slow steps closer to Ben like he was a bomb ready to explode. "You are your own person, Ben. I just can't get over the fact that you don't even want a summer break, time to relax?!"

"I'm finished with college Rey; I'm moving on. I'm letting go of parties and bar crawls." Ben slammed his hands into their shared dresser. "God, Rey. You're still holding on!"

Rey pleased, fighting back tears. "Don't do this, Ben."

"You a little, naïve college student and I, am an adult. I have a job, an apartment in the city. I'm. Moving. On."

A single tear streamed down her cheek. 

Instead of staying in his undershirt and boxers, Ben pulled a First Order quarter-zip sweater over his head and slid his long legs through a pair of dark jeans. 

At the same time, Rey undressed, leaving her in a matching black bra and panty set. She saw the conflict in him, but Ben would never admit to it. So she pleaded, hoping to make him stay. "Ben, you just graduated today, your diploma isn't coming in the mail until Tuesday. Get into bed. Please."

"It's time to let old things die, Rey." 

Holding his hand made things better. It eased his nerves when he turned in his thesis paper, when he was anxiously waiting for his internship acceptance letter, and soothed his anger when a classmate flaked on a group project. Something told Rey that right now, taking Ben's hand would only hurt her. 

Before she knew it, Ben had grabbed his car keys and exited their shared apartment with a _slam._ He was leaving Rey alone. 

Before she knew it, she was curled up on her side on the bed, longing for Ben. It wasn't until she heard the rev of his engine did her tears start streaming from her eyes. 

_He had no reason to come back._

**Present-day**

"It is my pleasure to introduce this year's distinguished alumni, Ben Solo, Vice President of the First Order Corporation!"

The roar of applause was muted in Rey's head. Her eyes shifted rapidly from his back, standing at the stage podium, to Han and Leia, with the twins bouncing on their laps. 

His speech, too, was muted in Rey's head, chiming in selectively. 

"I was sitting on this stage only two years ago."

_Don't remind me._

"So much has changed during that short time."

_You bet your ass it has._

"There are businesses and opportunities that are ready for you."

_Yeah, I worked my ass off to secure that position at Resistance Engineering._

"Congratulations, graduating class. It's time to close up this chapter of your life. Letting go presents challenges, but you're ready to move on to bigger and better things."

_Sounds familiar._

"I didn't know he was this year's guest speaker," Finn whispered from behind Rey as they slowly moved up the stairs. "Are you going to shake his hand?"

Rey lifted the sides of her graduation gown as she stepped up to the stage. "It'll be hard for Han and Leia to watch, but it'll look weird if I don't." She muttered under her breath. "We've tried to contact him several times, but and we never heard back. After a year, they started to lose hope."

"Rey Kenobi, Engineering." President Ackbar boomed. She heard miscellaneous cheering from the audience. 

_Take the diploma, shake his hand, walk away._

Rey held the diploma in her left hand and waved to the audience with her right. 

She did it: twins and all, she did it. Rey couldn't have done it if it weren't for Rose and Kaydel helping her through the pregnancy, Finn and Poe coming with her to doctor's appointments, and Han and Leia caring for the babies during the day. 

"Congratulations, Rey," Ben said, holding out his hand. "It's good to see you." She took it and gave him a harsh stare. 

"I'm sure it is." She spat as she let go of his hand. It took strength, but Rey didn't look back as she walked away and off the stage. 

Han and Leia were standing in the same spot where the three of them waited for Ben. This time, they had a pram stroller in hand. 

Rey excitedly ran towards them once she saw Han open his arms wide for a hug. "Congrats, kid. You made it."

"They weren't too bad during the ceremony, were they?" Rey asked, bending over to nustle the swaddled, sleeping babies. "I had no idea he was the guest speaker." She turned her head, still bent over. 

"Neither did we," Leia sighed, placing her hand on Rey's shoulder. "It doesn't matter now. Let's get back to the house. Everyone's waiting there for us."

Before parting in the parking lot, the group bid farewells will sound embraces and coos to the babies. 

"We'll see you at the house, Rey," Han yelled as they walked apart. 

-

"Did you say anything when you guys shook hands?" Hux asked as he closed the car door. 

Ben set the car in reverse and started to pull out of the spot slowly. "She brushed me off coldly. I guess I deserve that." Ben turned around and slammed on the brakes once he saw someone walk by pushing a stroller. 

"Watch out, Asshole!" the angry voice yelled as they cleared the vehicle. 

Ben immediately set the car into park and opened the door, ready to verbally fight back. But all he could say was, "Rey?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading!
> 
> the 'i raised our kids without you bc you left' trope is one of my favorites lol.
> 
> i recently read 'fastball' by sword_and_pen, 'it's only ever been you' by JesseNotJames, and 'want you more than a melody' by @darthswift13 on twitter and was inspired to write my own spin on it. I hope you enjoyed it! (also i recommend that you read those fics, they're fantastic. 
> 
> did'ja get where i got the baby names from? 
> 
> i'd love to hear what you thought of this so far, and i appreciate and welcome feedback!
> 
> find me on tumblr @benwaitingforsolo
> 
> edit : originally, rey’s last name was niima, which i love , since it doesn’t tie her to any other character. buuuut i wanted to change it to kenobi, because... i wanted to? believe me, i love rey from nowhere, but if she really had to be related to someone, i wouldn’tve minded if she was related to old man obi-wan. let me know what you think! (i really hope this doesn’t turn you off from this story)


	2. they're mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's time for both ben and rey to face reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kinda minor story edit: i’m changing rey’s last name to Kenobi. I love when Rey is given the last name of Niima, Kanata, Johnson, and many of the other names other writers have chosen for her. 
> 
> but also i just wanted to make her a kenobi because why the heck not. (i really hope this doesn’t turn you off from this story)

The first time Ben saw her was just her name in the program. 

_ Rey Kenobi, Mechanical Engineering _

The next time was during the graduates' entrance to the stage.

The third time was when she walked towards him after receiving her diploma.

_ She looked beautiful. _

"Congratulations, Rey, It's good to see you." 

"I'm sure it is," Rey replied.

Although their handshake was formal, touching Rey's hand was something Ben had missed for quite some time. 

He missed her touch when he had a tough day at work.

When he was worried about his project falling through.

He missed _everything_ about her. 

He wanted to hold on much longer after she walked away. His eyes stayed locked on Rey as he congratulated the people following behind. 

So when they came face to face again, Ben couldn't help but freeze. 

"Watch out, Asshole!"

Ben angrily came out of his car, ready to verbally fight the idiot pedestrian. 

"There's a sidewalk over there, why don't you walk on that?!" He wanted to yell.

But all he could say was, "Rey?"

She was at her car and fiddling with her keys by the time Ben caught up with her. 

Rey was glowing. And she was pushing a stroller. 

With her child in it? It hasn't been that long since they… broke up. 

"How… are you?" Ben asked, bringing his hand through his hair. 

Rey opened the back seat of the car and sighed roughly. "I'm doing fine. A lot  _ has  _ changed in two years." She said, in reference to his speech earlier, while placing her baby in their car seat. 

"How old is your baby?" Ben asked, stepping back to stay out of Rey's way. Ben watched her walk around to the other side. 

Rey positioned the open end of the stroller away from his view, hiding the fact that there was a second baby in the carrier. 

" _ They  _ just turned one in February. You're a numbers guy, you do the math." 

Rey buckled the second baby into their car seat and walked to the driver's seat. "Watch out, I'm reversing in a minute."

_ Turned one this February. _

_ Born last February. _

_ Nine months before February was May, two years ago.  _

_ When I left.  _

Rey pulled out of the spot, and Hux came up behind him. "What's going on?"

"They're mine." Ben said, spaced out. 

** Two years ago **

The group gathered in what was Ben and Rey's apartment, two weeks after finals, and the graduation, ready to go on their road trip through Route 66.

_ Ben wasn't supposed to go on this trip with us, anyway. _

"Are you all packed, Rey?" Rose asked, coming out of the bathroom.

Kaydel popped out of the kitchen and finished off a bag of chips. "I hope you are because the next time you leave this apartment will be to move into our new house!" 

Since Ben walked out two weeks ago, Rey still hadn't heard anything from him. She knew he came by to pick up his diploma because she left it on the counter, and it was gone when she came back.

Maybe it was the travel sickness, but Rey couldn't get through half a state without needing to stop and throw up. 

Normally, Rey was willing to eat anything; gas station donuts, side of the road tacos, questionable pizza. But now, her stomach was more sensitive than ever. 

And by the time they reached California, Rey was supposed to get her period. But it never came. 

Finn was the first one to notice her discomfort. Rey stayed quiet and more reserved than she typically was. 

"Peanut, are you doing okay?" Finn asked as he was filling up gas. Rey stuck her head out the window to get fresh air. "Something seems to be bothering you."

Finn and Rey were inseparable, maybe a bit separable, now that Poe was in the picture, but they had each other's back. 

_What would be the point of keeping things from him?_

"I mean, obviously, I'm fucked because of Ben." Rey resigned, leaning her arms on the door. "I've been feeling sick, and my period is late." 

Finn finished up the transaction and put the gas pump back into the dispenser. "Do you want me to grab a test for you inside? I'll do it on the down-low," Finn offered. 

"Can you? I want to get that option out of my mind."

The box of pregnancy tests stayed in Rey's bag for the remainder of the road trip. 

It wasn't until she came back to their apartment did she actually take it. 

She did the thing. Took out the stick, peed on it, and waited. While she waited, a sliver of hope in her was looking for a sign that Ben would be coming back. A note, rustled sheets, maybe an opened snack. But she found the opposite when she walked into the bedroom. His side of the closet was empty, his drawers were cleared, and come to think of it, his shampoo and conditioner weren't in the shower. 

_ He cleared out when I was gone.  _

Three minutes had definitely passed, and Rey looked returned back to the bathroom counter. Finn just had to get the easy-read tests. 

_ Pregnant _

**_ - _ **

** Present-day **

_ They're mine.  _

Before Rey pulled off, Ben stopped her at the driver's side window. 

"Wait!" Luckily, she stopped and rolled her windows all the way down. "Rey, I'm sorry. Why didn't you tell me?"

She scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Why didn't I tell you?" Her hands slapped on the steering wheel, "I tried Ben. You left without a word. Your parents tried, you haven't talked to them at all either!"

_ She wasn't wrong. _

"Listen; they're not going to stay asleep for much longer, and they need to eat. If you're really so concerned, I'm going to your parents' house." 

And she drove away. 

Ben was left speechless at the mention of his parents. He knew they reached out to him. He received texts and phone calls from them weekly. At some point, they even sent letters to his condo in the city, but he never bothered to open them.

But one day they stopped. 

"Wait, those babies are yours?" Hux cluelessly asked.

Ben straightened his jacket and replied, "she didn't say it outright, but the math makes sense. Born in February, nine months before February was May, and that was the last time we were together." 

"What a bitch, keeping your children from you. I'd sue her ass." Hux spat as they walked back to Ben's car. 

"She's in the right. I left and never looked back. If I had two babies to deal with, I don't think I would've made VP in two years." 

Like a repeat from five minutes ago, Hux and Ben closed the car doors and pulled out of their parking spot, more carefully this time. 

Hux immediately went on his phone, presumably to check his emails. Every day is a workday at the First Order. "Want to go out and drink to forget tonight? Phasma booked a table at the Kanji Klub." 

"No." Ben answered, "I guess I have some business to tend to now." 

"You're going to go to your parents?" Hux said, looking up from his phone. "Do they still not approve of you working for Snoke?"

"It doesn't matter now," Ben replies, not taking his eyes off the road. "Am I dropping you at Phasma's?"

Hux groaned and slammed the back of his head against the headrest. "No, you can leave me at the office, Snoke wants a revised version of the report we sent last week." 

"You just had to make this easier for me, heading in the direction of my parents, didn't you." Ben chuckled. "I had to face them sooner or later."

* * *

"Han, they're here!" Rey heard as she exited her car, walking to unbuckle the babies. 

Han came out the front doors, ready to help her bring Mae and Bail inside.

"How are my favorite twins doing?" Han asked, coming down the front steps.

Luke came out from around the side of the house. "Hey, I thought Leia and I were your favorite twins." He joked.

"You two lost that title a long time ago." Han laughed.

Rey always loved seeing their dynamic, quipping like they did when they were younger. "Still sleeping, for now. Can you guys keep them while I eat? I'm starving."

She slung her bag and diaper bag over her shoulder, and the two older, graying men pulled the sleeping babies out of their seats. Luke took Mae, Bail went with Han. 

Inside, Rey found Lando with his eyes on the TV, keeping up with today's baseball game. Amilyn and Leia were setting the table on the patio, and Maz and Chewie were bickering about the food in the kitchen. 

"Leia?" Rey called as she began making a plate for herself.

The grandmother of her children stopped what she was doing and joined Rey by her side. 

"He knows."

Leia knew precisely what she meant. They had all tried for months to contact him, receiving silence as a response. 

"And I told him we'd be here. He might come." 

The older woman sighed and closed her eyes. Rey could see the relief in her eyes. "Are you ready for him?"

"I'm not sure," Rey answered, sitting down at the table. "He'd have to know one day, right? He deserves to know."

Amilyn and Maz came through the back door, seeming to have switched holding the babies with Luke and Han.

"Rey," she began. "I know my son hasn't been the smartest. Be patient, nothing's impossible. For all we know, this will bring him back."

"Can I take the Mae and Bail to their room to sleep? I don't think I'm ready for him to be near them so soon." Rey asked, worry creeping through her voice. 

"Of course. We'll take care of him."

"Who's coming back?" Amilyn and Maz asked together. 

As if it was planned, Han's voice bellowed from inside the house, making the foundation rumble. 

"BEN!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading.
> 
> i received so many amazing, positive comments after posting the first chapter yesterday, that i immediately started working on this next chapter.
> 
> important question: how do you feel about the name of the fic? it's not my favorite, as it sounds similar to a one-shot i posted recently. any suggestions? let me know!
> 
> seriously, i left to take a shower after i posted the first chapter, and when I came back, there were so. many. comments. your kind words really motivate me to keep this going at a steady pace.
> 
> i hope to talk to you again very soon, and i hope you're doing well!
> 
> find me on tumblr @benwaitingforsolo
> 
> ps : i'm thinking we need a throwback chapter *laughs maniacally*


	3. that one night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's ben's last day of classes and he graduates in just two days. rey is ready to celebrate with him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> throwin' it back
> 
> warning: smut ahead, check the tags!

**Two years ago**

Ben's time in college culminated today, his major thesis presentation on statistics and finance. Over the past year, his free time, unfortunately, had gone to his internship, time in his office as a TA, and in the library to finish his thesis, leaving little time for Ben and Rey to spend together.

But today, it was all done. 

Rey had been looking forward to this day since Ben started his internship at First Order Co. She missed the luxury of staying in bed together until ten on the weekends, and casual lunch dates in between classes. 

But tonight, she'd celebrate his accomplishments. 

On a typical night when Ben was coming home late, his feet would be stomping up the stairs, exhausted from the day, and not looking forward to the next. Tonight, there was a spring in his step; excitement ran through his body, because today, his presentation on financial statistics went exceedingly well. 

On a typical night when Ben was coming home late, Rey would already be asleep. She was still an underclassman, so her classes were at nine in the morning. Tonight, Ben found her in the kitchen, bouncing from the stove to the cutting board, to checking on the oven. 

"Love, I'm so sorry, dinner would've been ready by now, but I had a bit of a seasoning mishap." Rey apologized, scrambling to set the table. 

Ben leaned against the doorway of the kitchen in awe. Who knew that talkative girl from the library would be sharing a bed with him. 

At first, Ben complained about her to Poe, his childhood friend. But oddly enough, Poe was her TA. "What are you talking about, Ben? Rey is the sweetest thing ever to set foot in the Engineering Department."

_And she was the sweetest thing ever to set foot in his life._

"C'mere." he said, still leaned on the doorframe. 

"In a sec, I have to put the napkins on the table."

"Rey," Ben stated, arms now open wide. "Please, come here. I never get to hug you when I come home."

She would never resist being in his arms. Once he wrapped his arms around her during her panic about a project deadline in the library, she vowed that it wouldn't be the last time she was in his arms.

"I'm so happy you're home, Ben." Rey said, looking up from below him. 

Ben kissed the top of her head, thanking her for her presence. 

As they ate, they talked about Ben's presentation, Rey's new engineering project, and about each other. After that, the pair worked together to clear the table so they could both earn their desserts. 

Ben rinsed the dishes and asked. "Seriously, Rey, the dinner was delicious. I wouldn't have even known you dropped the whole pepper grinder in it."

"Yeah, because I spent 15 minutes picking each individual one out of the sauce."

Their short giggles on the couch quickly escalated to extended kisses that traveled them to the bedroom. 

"I miss you." Rey moaned in between their connection. 

"Sweetheart, I'm right here," Ben replied, setting her down on the bed.

Rey stopped their actions and held Ben with her hands on both sides of his face, forcing their eyes together. "No, Ben. I _miss_ you."

"Oh fuck," Ben spoke, "baby, I'm so sorry I was never around." He said as they both began to undress. 

Rey beat him to it and made her way to pull down his pants and boxers.

She immediately whimpered when Ben brought his hands to her breasts, giving slight caresses over her tight nipples. Additionally, she whimpered at the sight of his cock springing up. 

"I missed you too." Ben purred and lowered himself to his knees. "I missed your lips, your tits, I missed your ass." His hands traced around her body. "God, I missed your tight pussy."

Overwhelmed, despite only just starting, Rey laid back on their bed. "Be with me." She whispered, desperate for his touch.

Ben knocked Rey's knees wide, giving him full view and access to everything she had to offer. "I am baby; I'll give you anything." He caressed the inside of one thigh with his finger, "I'll give you everything you want."

Before Rey could mutter an answer, Ben knew what she wanted. He started slow, building tension around her core by placing gentle, yet wet, kisses and licks on her clit. Rey's back arched and her legs wanted to close on instinct, but Ben held her down with just one arm. Meanwhile, his other hand was busy moving from a tight grip on her ass to grazing through her folds to give him a second to rest. He'd eat her all day long if he didn't have to breathe. Those long, wet trails of his tongue on her cunt could have Rey down for hours. 

Ben was dedicated to his internship, so of course, their relationship had to be compromised, even during sex. 

They heard Ben's phone vibrate from his pants pocket, which was on the floor. Rey groaned and tucked herself into bed as Ben answered.

"Hello?" Ben paused, "no, Sir, absolutely no bother." another pause. "Thank you, Mr.Snoke, I won't let you down. I'll see you then." 

Rey raised one eyebrow, curious to know if that phone call was worth him stopping. 

"It was Snoke," Ben's mentor, "there's an important contract coming through the First Order, and he wants me to start the week after graduation!"

"But, we have the road trip?" Rey questioned, disappointment in her tone. 

Ben combed through his hair with his fingers, his tell when something is pulling him apart on the inside. "I know, sweetheart. But I can't, not do this. This is a great start for me."

Rey opened her arms for Ben to join her under the covers. "I'm proud of you, love." She said as Ben crawled to her. "But you also can't not finish what you started down there." She pointed to where her crotch would be under the blanket.

A smirk grew on Ben's face, eager to get back to work on Rey. 

However, Rey surprised him by disappearing under the covers to get to work on him; to make him remember what he's going to miss at his high-rise condo on Lake Shore Drive, what he'd be missing while Rey's on the road trip. 

She worked even harder, licking from the base to the tip, around all the sides, taking him to the back of her throat, even taking his balls in her mouth. When Rey showed no signs of stopping, Ben brought his free hand, the other was behind his head, to the back of Rey's encouraging her to keep going. 

His tell-tale grunts told Rey that he couldn't possibly take more. Unless she asked, of course. 

"Can I?"

_Hop onto your cock and ride you through the night,_ she thought but didn't add verbally. But Ben knew what she meant. 

Ben's lips separated, and he brought his hands to either side of Rey's hips as she straddled his hips and lowered herself down. 

Once Rey had gotten settled, their hips began to thrust against each other. As their bodies continued to move, Ben's grip changed to the round of her ass, once again, lifting, to encourage her to keep moving. 

Rey inclined forward to bite and peck at his neck, which was arguably his favorite thing to do to Rey, so Ben fought back when she decided she was doing that first. 

"Ready baby?" Ben asked mischievously.

Rey moaned into in between her conquest around his throat, "Ready for wha-!"

He scooped Rey under her armpits and flipped them over so that he could be on top and in control. 

Ben readjusted his position, still deeply inserted into Rey. His hand snaked the perimeter of her body to meet her wrists over the pillows. "You're going to love the new bed I picked, Rey."

"Oh yeah?' She panted, "Why's that?"

As he was continually moved vigorously, Ben brought his lip to Rey's breasts, circling around her nipples with his tongue. 

"Because, sweetheart," he broke in as he switched to the other side, "it's a four-poster bed. And I can finally use those ropes you've been asking me for, for so long." 

_For now,_ Ben thought, _holding her wrists down would have to do._

He watched as Rey's face quivered, and her insides tightened at the mention and action of being tied down. 

"You love the idea of being tied down, don't you, Rey?" Ben drawled. Rey could only respond with a hum and frantic nod. "I could get you at your wrists and your ankles. All spread and open for me." Rey grew closer and closer to her climax as he teased and repeatedly thrusted. "Allowing me to give and take anything I want, right?"

Rey's chin tilted upwards while the crown of her head dug into the pillow below her. "Yes!" She moaned, involuntarily squeezing even tighter. 

"Such a dirty girl," Ben grunted, increasing the speed of his movement. "Want me to come on your tits?" he offered since they were going sans condom. 

"No, no no no no, please-" Rey groaned, wanted to keep their connection going as long as possibly. "Stay, please," she begged, "I'm about to cum!"

"I am too, baby girl, you've been so good to me. You've been taking your pill regularly, right?"

"Yes!"

_She made me dinner._

_She dealt with me stopping._

_She sucked my cock._

_She's such a good girl._

"Yes, who?" Ben repeated, letting go of one hand and slapping the visible side of her ass, still her ass, no less. 

"Yes, Daddy!" She screamed, looking up at him. 

His cock twitched at the sounds of her moans, their bodies colliding together, and her calling him 'Daddy.'

"Good girl," he moaned. "Ready to come for me?"

Instead of responding, Rey lifted her head so that their lips met again. 

Ben's movements became sporadic; Rey's moans grew louder.

Over time, Ben and Rey consistently came together as if they trained to do so. Tonight was no different. Once one came, the other followed. 

Rey felt his length pulse intensely, and his load hit deep inside, triggering a rush of liquid to escape from her. Ben released his grip on her wrist and kissed her lips lovingly. 

Panting for breath, Ben moved out and off of Rey, and collapsed to the side of her. She nearly jumped as his weight hit the bed. 

Rey laid motionlessly, and their combined fluids slowly dripped out of her and onto the sheets. She was attempting to find the motivation to get up. Thinking about not getting a UTI was enough motivation. Rey rolled to the side and kissed Ben's cheek.

"I'm going to pee and get some water. Want a glass?" She asked, rolling off the bed. 

"Yes. With ice, please, thank you," Ben answered, still looking for his breath to return to normal. 

Before leaving the room, Rey turned her head around, "no problem, Daddy." She said with a wink and a click. 

* * *

**Present-day**

_Daddy_

Rey brought the palm of her hand to her forehead, thinking of the last time she associated the word 'Daddy' with Ben. Who would've thought that one time changed everything? 

"Mummy's quite the idiot, isn't she loves?" She said with a mouthful of food as she watched to Mae and Bail babbling about in their shared playspace. 

The twins giggled about something. Maybe it was about her? Who knew what they communicated about? They brought surprises each day.

And today brought quite the shock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i originally planned a whole flashback/forward thing in my head. but then this completely derailed that thought lol. we'll get into what happened over the past two years next. 
> 
> thank you again for reading, leaving kudos, and so many amazing comments. your actions really motivate me to keep going. 
> 
> i'd love to hear your feedback!
> 
> hope you're doing well!
> 
> find me on tumblr @benwaitingforsolo
> 
> ps: i have some asks to work on over on my tumblr, so the next chapter might be a few days away. if you like what i've written so far, i'd love it if you read some of my other works! love you!


	4. everything together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I miss her. I'm sorry. Can I see her?
> 
> I've missed so much.
> 
> I’ve missed too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's a lil description of things mentioned in the chapter:
> 
> Pritzker Pavillion - an outdoor amphitheater at Millenium Park in Chicago, IL 
> 
> The Bean - 'cloud gate' : a large bean-shaped sculpture with a mirrored outside, in Millenium Park.

After Ben let Armitage go at the office, it was as if he was driving on autopilot to his parents' house. It may have been offensively long since he'd been there, but it indeed was overdue. 

Ben should be angry, furious. They are his children.

But Ben was emotional. Over the two years since he left, he missed her every day. No one, not a date, not someone at the coffee shop, no one, stuck out to Ben like Rey did. To top that, Rey had been through hell and back, and he was too self-absorbed ever to know.

* * *

** Two years ago **

"Are you absolutely fucking certain this one doesn't have alcohol in it?' Ben heard Poe press the food truck server. "If I taste this and it has alcohol, you'll never hear the end of it." Poe took the tray and turned around. "Ben! Quite a shock to see you here." He said, slightly condescending. 

"I didn't know you weren't drinking?" Ben started. "The company set up a tent for all of us for some 'team outing.' You know how it goes."

It was a hot summer evening in the city, and the whole of Chicago filed into the Pritzker Pavillion for Movies in The Park. Tonight's showing, La La Land, Rey's favorite movie. 

"It's not for me, the virgin daiquiri is for Rey," Poe stated bluntly, ready to walk away. 

_ Rey, his Rey, who he walked out on three months ago.  _

"Wait, Poe." Ben turned, completely forgetting about his spot in line. "How is she?"

"She doing great. You're lucky she has me, and Finn, and Rose, and Kaydel." 

"I am." 

_ I miss her. I'm sorry. Can I see her? _ He wanted to ask.

Ben was always jealous of the tight curls that Poe grew on his head. But right now, Ben was jealous that Poe had Rey in his life, and he doesn't. "Tell her I said, 'hello,' please."

"You really should do it yourself. Although I'm not too sure how happy she'd be to hear from you." Ben's heart cracked a bit.  _ Had she moved on? Is she too busy to even think about him anymore? _ "See you later, Ben."

Brokenhearted, Ben watched Poe walk back to his picnic area. Rey looked beautiful in that flowy sundress, which she, and he adored. He watched Poe hand her her drink, and she seemed relieved to have a refreshing beverage. However, her facial expression didn't seem to change if Poe did mention he was there. 

"Do not lose focus, young Solo." Ben heard over his shoulder. It was Snoke, his mentor, now boss at First Order. "A girl would only sway you on your path to greatness." 

* * *

** Present-day  **

When Ben pulled into his parents' cul-de-sac, he felt a rush of déjà vu as he parked his car on the curb just past the driveway. The spot he had always left his car in. 

Birds in the surrounding trees abruptly left their perches, and Ben jumped at the deep bellow of his father yelling his name.

"BEN!"

"Hi, Dad." He said, closing his car door and clicking his keys. Ben looked up and saw him standing at the front steps of their house. 

"We've been waiting for this day for a long time," Han said, still standing strong at the door. 

Ben stopped on the lawn, almost afraid to step any closer. "It's too late for me. Isn't it?"

Han came down the stairs and met his son on the grass. "That doesn't matter. You're home; your mother misses you, we miss you."

"I fucked up Dad, I can't be forgiven for this. My life is being torn apart."

Han reached out to his son for the first time in a long time, willing to take him back. "I haven't been the best father, you know that. But I'll help you."

Ben looked down and kicked the ground. "Where is she?"

"Rey's with the babies, I think they're still sleeping." Han replied, pointing to the window that was Ben's room.

"That's not who I meant."

* * *

** Two years ago **

"Here you go, Rey. Your extra virgin strawberry daiquiri." Poe said, handing the drink to Rey, who was sitting on the blanket, legs extended. 

"Oh, thank god," Rey sighed, taking the cup. "This heat is killing me. Is the movie starting soon?"

Finn, who was seated next to Rey, handed her their bag of popcorn. "I think so, peanut. Are you feeling okay?" Finn asked, circling his hand on her back. 

Since the day Rey told Finn and Poe about her predicament, they were on board, ready to help her at a moment's notice. 

"Yeah, I just hope I don't have to go pee. It's like my bladder is a trampoline!" Rey laughed, "I don't want to walk all the way to The Bean again."

"We wouldn't let you." Poe began, purposely avoiding the elephant in the pavilion. "We'd carry you, of course."

"Noooo!" Rey ached. "These babies have made me gain so much weight already, I don't want to subject either of you to that struggle."

Those two would do anything for her, she quickly learned. 

When Rose told them she had a craving for Hot Cheetos and cream cheese, they were at the door in thirty minutes. 

Rose and Kaydel, on the other hand, were available at a moment's notice whenever Rey wanted a buddy for her many, many ultrasound appointments. 

And when Rey had the spur of energy to make a big spaghetti dinner, her friends, no, her family, surrounded her with love. Even Han and Leia came over to join. 

"How'd the doctor's go, Rey?" Leia asked, sipping a glass of wine as Rey stirred the pot. "It's not much longer until you pop."

Kaydel swapped spots with Rey so that she could take a seat. "So amazing, we got more pictures of the babies. Do you want to see?" Leia nodded.

Rey waddled over to her purse and dug for the small photos from her visit. Her belly had grown so large she could barely see her feet. But, she found the pictures and waddled back over. 

"Is that... both of them?" Leia asked, shocked at the picture she held in her hand. 

Rey brought a finger to one of the bodies. "this one is Mae," and then moved to the other, "and that's Bail." 

"Nice choices, Kid." Han chimed in, "Are you ready to eat? I'm sure they're starving. I know when Leia was pregnant with Ben, she ate like a cow. And there was only one of him!"

Leia smacked Han's arm with the back of her free hand. 

Rey giggled at their marital spout. But it quickly passed as she felt an elbow and a foot push around her insides, causing Rey to exhale sharply. "Yep," she groaned, "they're hungry."

And boy, were they.

From the moment the twins were born, Bail first, with Mae as a close second, they ate like Rey did as a child, as if there wouldn't be the next meal. 

Fortunately for them, Rey had an endless supply. Enough to where she could feed them on her own, and still have more to pump. This way, the twins could go to Nonna's and Papa's whenever she needed them to.

Rey was quite lucky. Her courses translated easily to an online format, allowing her to join the class via video call. Additionally, Rose and Kaydel burped the babies so that Rey could get back to work. Finn and Poe were uncles of the century and did the small errands that Rey couldn't do herself.

It really did take a village to raise a child. In Mae and Bail's case, a whole city. 

* * *

** Present-day **

"I think she's still in the back," Han replied, bringing his hand behind his head. 'She'll be happy to see you."

"Let's hope so." 

Ben watched his mother finely chop some food and slide it into some bowls, presumably, for the babies. He was fortunate no one else had gathered on the patio. 

Leia poured some water into tiny cups and set down the pitcher. "Have you been eating enough, Benny?"

"Yes, Mom. I have." 

"Then why,"  _ smack to the arm _ , "didn't you," s _ mack to the shoulder _ , "have the guts to see that sweet girl for two years?" She finished him off with a  _ smack to the back of the head _ . 

"I'm sorry, Mom." Once again, Ben felt rush of déjà vu. The last time he said "sorry, Mom" on the patio was when he stayed out past his curfew.

His mother gathered the prepared dishes and set them in front of a pair of wooden highchairs. 

_ I've missed so much. _

"We both know that I am not the one you should be apologizing to. Now take a seat." Leia purposefully pointed to Ben's old seat, which was appropriately the farthest from the highchairs. 

As if on cue, the sliding doors opened. Ben watched his Uncle Lando, Aunt Amilyn, Auntie Maz, and Uncle Chewie walk through the sliding doors. Lastly, Rey stepped through with her two babies, one on each hip. 

"Nonna!" Rey began. Her chiming voice sent chills down Ben's spine. "You've got two, hungry grandchildren calling for you!"

The twins babbled in unison. "Nonononono"

Ben grew flushed, embarrassed, nervous to be so near her. But she paid little attention in his direction. He was also astonished as he watched Rey slide the babies into their seats as if they weighed nothing. 

Leia put on her baby voice as she zoomed towards Rey and spoke directly to the babies. "Yes, yes, my sweethearts. Nonna made your favorite! Chicken and avocado!"

His heart melted when he heard cheerful babbling and watched the babies dig into their food. 

Ben observed how she acted towards her children. Scooping up their dropped pieces, lifting their cups to their lips, wiping the excess out of their hair. 

_ I've missed too much.  _

This overwhelmed Ben. Stressed him out, even. Rey has spent the last two years with her babies while he was __ working nine to five and working up the corporate ladder. 

His heart raced, his hands grew clammy, his eyes watered. He needed to get off this patio.

Ben took one last look at the babies before he rushed down the stairs. 

"Ben?" Rey asked, her eyes following him down the stairs. "I'll be right back my loves. Mummy should go help him." She brought her hands to the top of their heads and rubbed them adoringly before she ran down the stairs to follow him. 

"Ben!" Rey yelled, catching up with him. "Wait, please!"

The car engine started and Ben was inches away from getting in and leaving. But he stopped. "You don't deserve this, Rey. I should have been there. I don't deserve you." Ben cried, gripping on to the door handle. 

"Don't go again." 

Ben let go of the handle and looked up to the sky.

"I'm angry Ben. No, I'm fucking pissed." Rey began, moving closer to him. "We all tried to reach out to you. I wanted you to come back, to be involved, or even to just know. Even if you didn't want them, I wanted you to know." She didn't even realize tears welled in her eyes. "I've worked my ass off to make it to today. My advisors told me to take a break, I but I fucking did it. Twins and all."

Lightheaded, Ben sat down on the curb, hands behind his head, head between his knees. "I don't want to go again. I wanted to come back. I want to know them."

The point of Rey's heel entered Ben's eye-line. "Mae and Bail."

Ben looked up.

"Their names. Mae and Bail."

Tears fell down both of their cheeks. Ben wrapped his long arms around Rey's legs. 

"Listen, Ben," Rey said, with her fingers combing through his hair. "Neither of us are ready for a complete uprooting of our lives. We are far from solid and clear, but we can shape up. Together."

"I wanted you to join me." Ben said, sniffling, "In the city. I wanted to give you everything."

Rey offered her hands to Ben, wanting him to stand. Once he did stand, their eyes locked together, both still wet from their tears. "You have, my love. They are my everything."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey you! thank you for reading this chapter!
> 
> i hope the frequent time jumps weren't too confusing. if they were, please let me know and i'd love to re-edit it.
> 
> my biggest writer struggle is leaving out details about plot or character history. so, if you have any 'canonical' questions, ask away in the comments!
> 
> i appreciate you and your feedback!
> 
> hope you're doing well!


	5. on your own

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Please," Ben begged, "what can I do? To help you? To know them?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's a lil explanation of chicago things mentioned in this chapter:
> 
> the L - the elevated train system  
> tribune tower - the chicago tribune is a newspaper  
> nandos - chicken restaurant based from south africa (?) many chains around the world  
> maggie daley skating ribbon - in millenium park, a skating rink that's kinda like a track in the winter?  
> 95th floor - restaurant on the 95th floor of john hancock building.

_ "You have, my love. They are my everything." _

Rey brought her hand to Ben's cheek, holding him like she used to. He looked relieved to be in her hands again. 

"But Ben, you left and never looked back and never said anything. You left me to figure this all out on my own. I can't forgive you for that."

Ben pulled away from her hold, feeling undeserving of her touch. "I don't blame you. I was so caught up in wanting Snoke's praise that I let that get the best of-"

Rey cut him off. "As much as I want to listen to you, I need to get this out." She took a step away from Ben, ending their rekindling. "You know me better than anybody. That means you know how I feel about people leaving." She started, "After you left and I learned that I was pregnant, I almost didn't keep them. But then I realized I'd be doing the same thing that my parents did to me; abandon me and never think about me again. I couldn't continue that cycle." 

"Rey, I- I know what I've done is unforgivable. But if you let me, I want to regain your trust and be part of Mae and Bail's lives," Ben confessed. 

"Did you ever think about me? About coming back to what you left behind?"

* * *

** Two years ago **

Since he walked out, he thought about her during all hours, every day.

_ They don't understand. They don't support me. I'll make them understand soon enough.  _

Ben's first day of work was dreary. The Chicago sky was gray with the clouds of spring rain. As it always was, the "L" was crowded with students commuting to school and adults in suits on their way to work. 

So many things in the city reminded him of her.

The Tribune Tower - She would leave the newspaper on the counter for him to read during his morning coffee. 

The Nando's on Michigan Avenue - Which she would beg to go to, as it reminded her of London. 

The skating ribbon - Where they went last winter, and Ben swore, he bruised his tailbone.

But all it was now was his new home and workplace.

Ben pushed through the large glass doors of the First Order Corp. and was welcomed by his college mentor, now boss, Andrew Snoke, Snoke, professionally, right at the door. 

"Benjamin!" Snoke greeted. "We've been waiting for this day for a long time." Snoke brought his hand to Ben's back, leading him to the elevators. "When I first saw you, I saw what all mentors live to see — pure, absolute intelligence. You are something truly special, you remind me of your grandfather when he was at his prime. Do not disappoint me, young Solo."

"I will not, sir. Your mentorship has trained me to avoid distractions, unnecessary aspects of my life."

And when she crept into his thoughts, it was as if Snoke was in his head too, ready to reel his attention back to his calling. 

In August, when he saw Poe at the pavillion and Rey from afar, he came in at the perfect moment. 

_ "Do not lose focus, young Solo, for a girl would only sway you from your path to greatness." _

In December, he wanted to go to his parents' for the holidays and ask for mercy for the silence over seven months. But, Snoke sent him to New York to attend and represent at a conference. 

_ "It's time to complete your training, Ben. Represent the First Order well." _

In February, something inside Ben shook, tried to get his attention, wake him up, even. But his report on the new year's investments and planning took over his whole agenda. 

_ "You have done extraordinary work in the little months since you have joined us, Solo. Prove it for all to behold." _

After a year of work, his focus had drastically shifted. After a year of work, he was offered the position of Chief Financial Officer, Vice President of the company. 

_ "The world will know your name, of your greatness, my boy. Your senator mother and general father only held you back. You have risen to such power since putting your history behind you." _

And after another year of being buried in his work, his personal life and history didn't dare cross his mind. Ben didn't have time for Tinder hook-ups or dates on the 95th Floor. The First Order was his relationship, his days and nights were congested with his job.

Only the proposition of speaking at his alma mater's graduation ceremony gave him a break. 

* * *

** Present-day **

Ben had no answer, his face had shown it all. 

_ He did think of her (occasionally.)  _

But then it ceased.

_ He did want to come back (for a short period of time.) _

But then he never reconsidered. 

He was sorry, but saying it out loud would make no difference. 

"Please," Ben begged, "What can I do? To help you? To know them?"

Rey, too, was being torn apart. She was angry, two years pass, and he can just show up like it was nothing? Rey wanted to be merciful, allowing her children the chance to know their father. But this kind of carelessness, she learned, only leads to more hurt later on. So, she continued with strength and caution.

Rey's body changed to a defensive stance, arms crossed, chin high, feet planted into the ground. 

"You can do what I've done. Figure it out on your own."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a short one, i know. and i apologize :(
> 
> i love this fic, but i hate that the last five chapters have only gone though one day! i really want to explore how ben and rey interact moving forward and how ben learns how to be a dad. 
> 
> thank you for reading, and for leaving so many amazing comments. i really do appreciate your feedback and suggestions, it helps me stay on track with where this story will go. 
> 
> you are amazing. thank you.
> 
> hope you're doing well


	6. mumma knows best

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben held the book in both of his hands and took a deep breath at the sight of 'BASK & MSSK - February 29.' His eyes dwelled on the decorated pages, filled with pictures that showed moments from Rey's pregnancy, ultrasound images, the baby shower, the birth. All of the moments Ben wished he stayed around for, that he wished he knew even existed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some chicago things mentioned in this chapter / minor plot details - 
> 
> not sure if i've mentioned this previously, but i imagine Ben and Rey as students (now alumni) from Northwestern University, a large university in Illinois. The Organa-Solo's live in Evanston, the town closest to the school. Rey and the babies live in Winnetka, another town nearby, in grandfather Kenobi's old house (both towns are old-money rich but that's not important to the story lol.)

_"You can do what I've done. Figure it out on your own."_

Rey was confident with her words. Her sentence showed no signs of faltering. (yet)

"This does not mean that you're going back to the patio and introducing yourself to the babies. Or, does it mean that you're part of their lives 24/7." Rey continued, "God, I've imagined this day a thousand times, and I never actually thought it would happen." She said this to herself, dropping her hands to her legs and staring up at the sky. 

Ben realized his car was still running, so he shut it off with a click on his keys and awkwardly shoved them back in his pocket. "No, Rey. I get it. You're in control of everything. You know what's best for them. All I know are their names and that Mae looks like me and Bail looks like you."

"I'm glad we're at an agreement then."

"To what? You knowing what's best or the looks thing?" 

Among the dozens of other things that Ben realized he missed about her, her smile was at the top of the list. Her cheeky smile was one that made his knees go weak, and his heart skip a beat. And he savored basking in her smile. 

Her smile was cut off when she heard high-pitched cries and yells from the backyard, and she quickly turned in that direction, her mum-instinct honing in. 

Immediately, Rey hustled to the backyard and up the stairs to the patio, looking to find the cause of the shrieks. Rey trusts everyone on the patio with the babies' lives. However, they're still one-year-olds, and anything can happen to them. 

In the womb, their limbs battled each other for space in Rey's tiny body.

On the boobs, they would butt heads for whichever one looked better.

When playing, the twins would fight for the play keyboard.

In the bath, they'd compete for bubbles on their wet heads.

And right now, in their separate high chairs, Mae and Bail were both covered in chocolate cake and frosting. 

"They couldn't wait for Mama!" Maz defended, salvaging the dessert platter. 

Relief washed over Rey's face once she knew the twins were alright. But, she also rolled her eyes and huffed at the thought of bathing them at Leia and Han's instead of at home. 

Chewie walked by with a fork in his hand and took a bite of the mashed cake on the table. "So they can eat cake with their hands, and it's cute, but when I do it, I look weird?" 

Rey took a fingerful of cake from the pile that the babies' created. "I don't blame them, Auntie Maz' cake is our favorite." She said, gazing at her twins. "Isn't it, loves?"

Mae and Bail responded with babbled and cheers, licking the cake from their fingers and their place settings. Once again, Ben stood agape at Rey's strength as she lifted the mischievous pair from their seats and carried them both inside.

"I leave for five minutes, and I come back and find you two covered in cake. You cheeky monkeys!" Rey's voice trailed away as she walked back into the house to wash off the babies. 

Ben wanted to follow behind, walk through the open screen door, go with Rey, continue their conversation, and be near the children. But, his mother's hand around his wrist stopped him before he took a step. 

"There are some things that you should see before you proceed, Ben," Leia said. Her tone reminded him of when she'd give him specific instructions about being home-alone as a pre-teen. 

His parents' living room was arranged similarly to how it was when Ben still lived there. A television mounted above the fireplace, the large couch a few feet away, and the window still had two chairs and a large bookshelf set nearby. The only differences were the additions of frames with pictures of their grandchildren and more photo albums taking space on the shelf. 

Leia lifted her arms and raised her heels to reach for a book on one of the higher shelves. "Your father has always liked to humor himself by leaving things out of my reach." 

Ben eyed at the book she was reaching for and grabbed it himself. "This one, Mom?"

"That's the one."

Ben held the book in both of his hands and took a deep breath at the sight of _'BASK & MSSK - February 29.' _ His eyes dwelled on the decorated pages, filled with pictures that showed moments from Rey's pregnancy, ultrasound images, the baby shower, the birth. All of the moments Ben wished he stayed around for, that he wished he knew even existed. 

It was only a few minutes Ben was looking through the photo album. It wasn't ideal, but glimpses into Rey's life from the past two years lifted a small amount of weight off his shoulders.

"She's a fighter, that one." Leia started, pulling Ben to sit next to her on the sectional. "She really can get through anything. She could've kept everything to herself, and those babies would still be perfectly fine. Han and I had to beg her to let us come over to cook dinner and be with them so that she could have time for herself." Ben listened and kept passing through the pages. 

"I left, Mom." Ben stopped on the page that displayed a picture of Rey holding the babies after they were born. "I didn't just let her down; I let you down."

Leia took the album from Ben's grasp. "And this is how you're like Han. There were days and weeks where I didn't know when he'd come back. I wouldn't hear anything from him, and I couldn't tell him anything." She brought her hand to Ben's shoulder. "You Solo boys always come back. It might be overdue, but you do, and you're always welcome with open arms." 

Wet thumps and pitched giggles came crawling from the bathroom, racing through the hallway and into the living room. 

"Speaking of open arms." Leia started, excited to see her grandchildren come to her again. She picked up Mae and placed her into her lap. Meanwhile, Bail wiggled and climbed up the couch to wrap his little body around his grandmother. Their hair was damp, they were in matching pajamas, and they smelled like soft baby soap. 

Mae nuzzled herself onto Leia's shoulder, looking towards Ben. It was the closest he's ever been to the babies. Their eyes met, and it was like Ben was looking at a younger version of himself, up close. Her features were dark like his. Ben couldn't help but smile when the baby girl reached her arm towards him. 

He wanted to offer his finger to her. Would she reach both her arms to him to go on his lap?

But Ben knew he needed to respect their agreement. 

It'll be on her terms when Ben meets them. 

Moments later, Rey joined everyone in the living room, barefoot and slightly damp from bathing the babies. "Better enjoy this while you can. They're slap-happy from the cake." 

Han scooped Bail into his arms and tossed him around, causing him to laugh sweetly. "It's a special day, Rey! They're allowed to be excited!" Han chuffed, flipping Bail upside-down. 

Rey walked over to Han and joined in on tickling the baby boy. "I'm sure they'll be sooo excited when I tell them it's almost time to go home!" 

It was impossible not to grin at the sound of Bail's throaty laugh, especially since Ben realized it sounded similar to his own. 

Leia lowered Mae to the ground so she could wander around. "Go pack some food for yourself Rey, this way, you can relax tomorrow."

Rey nodded and headed back to the kitchen and did as she was told. 

Leia nudged her son with her elbow as if to say, "go to her."

Ben obliged and did as he was told. 

Before interrupting her focus, Ben remarked at how her method of arranging leftovers had changed. Previously, she would spoon everything into a huge container and pray that it would keep nicely in the fridge. Right now, she methodically separated the vegetables from the meat and the sauces from the grains. 

_Probably something she picked up since I've been gone._ Ben thought. 

Just as Ben was about to begin, Rey started first. "It's been a long day, Ben. I have to get the twins into the car, which they will not want to do; drive back to Winnetka, and get them into bed, and God knows how long that will take." Rey tilted her head over to him after the _snap_ of the last corner of the Tupperware. "Can we keep talking about them another time? Same number as before?" She asked, taking out her phone. 

"No... " Ben began, "I've had a different number since I joined FO. Snoke insisted that I got rid of the cell connected to my parents and just use a company phone."

The _slam_ of stacking the containers over each other was noticeably more violent. "Of course he did. No wonder you never picked up our calls or answered our texts." She offered her phone to Ben so he could add his contact to her phone. "I'll text you when I'm ready. Okay?"

"I know," Ben said, looking up from typing. "It's all up to you, Rey." He handed the phone back to her. "I know my apologies aren't adequate for what I've done. But I really do want to be in their lives, and yours."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you thank you thank you for reading this chapter!
> 
> would you hate this if i included some texting between Ben and Rey? I'm dying to write in the present, on a different freaking day than Rey's graduation day. 
> 
> as always, i look forward to reading your comments. they motivate me to keep writing! i'd love to read your feedback and suggestions from this chapter or some things you'd like to see! additionally, if you have any plot questions let me know haha
> 
> i love you. thanks again, i hope you're doing well. 
> 
> EDIT - originally the babies' initials were BAS and MSS, but i've decided to add Kenobi to their name. rey is kind enough to give them their father's name, but they've always been hers. (so now the initials are BASK and MSSK - solo-kenobi just flows better haha)
> 
> find me on tumblr @benwaitingforsolo


	7. neither can we

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey:  
> the only time i get on my phone is when they're literally sleeping.  
> how about this? you can ask me one question about the twins a day, and i'll answer after they're asleep.
> 
> Ben:  
> I'll take it. Anything else I can do for you or them?
> 
> Rey:  
> in time. i'll tell you when. goodnight, ben.
> 
> Ben:  
> Night, Rey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chicago things mentioned in this chapter: 
> 
> The Loop - a neighborhood in downtown Chicago - a central business district, with the Willis Tower and Millenium Park in the area  
> Portillos - chain restaurant with Chicago classic food (if you ever come close to a Portillos, you NEED to go)  
> O'Hare - an airport  
> Mariano's - grocery chain, and they have a gelato bar inside lol (super bougie, we'll continue in Mariano's in the next chapter too)  
> Rogers Park - a neighborhood in Chicago  
> Lincoln Park - (another) neighborhood in Chicago. 
> 
> also - from the last chapter, i've changed the twin's initials to hyphen the Solo-Kenobi name. just wanted to let you know if you read chapter six before i made the edit!

The process of taking the twins home was more relaxed than Rey expected. In reverse to how they arrived at the Solo home, Luke and Han carried them out of the house and bucked them into their seats, all while they were asleep. For once, Rey could drive without nursery rhymes blaring from the speakers. The silence, however, forced her to reflect on the past 12 hours. 

For the past two years, she had done it all with her friends and family's help. 

_Who am I to let him back in so quickly? What has he done?_

Would he have run to 7-11 for Slurpees at 7 AM? - he didn't, Finn did.

Would he have accompanied her to her OB appointments? - he didn't, Rose did. 

Would he have cooked dinner so that she could do laundry? - he didn't, Leia and Han did. 

Would he have helped move them into her grandfather's old house? - he didn't, Poe did. 

Would he have been at the birth? - he wasn't. Everyone else was. 

_Don't let it be easy, Rey. Make him work for it._

* * *

"Can I just ask one thing of you, Rey?" Ben pleaded, still aware of their conversations from earlier in the day. She nodded apologetically. "Can you text me when you get home?" 

"I can do that for you, Ben."

* * *

Ben watched her leave the house and pull out of the driveway. All he could do after the car lights disappeared into the night was think. 

_Where do I begin?_

_I don't know how to be a dad._

_How much does she hate me?_

_God, this is too much for one day._

_I need to lie down._

Like he would after a late night-out, Ben trudged to his childhood bedroom. His eyes were closed shut the whole way, even as he opened the door and walked through. Luckily, he opened them before dropping onto his bed, because he would've gotten a face full of crib. 

_They changed my room into their room._

Ben looked around the space. The dark-blue walls had changed to various shades of gray. His wall of posters was swapped for maps and charming art. The spot where his desk was, was now changing table. The cubed shelving unit was still there, but the contents changed from his clothes to baby clothes, toys, and books. 

He took in everything he could. It was clear that the babies spent a lot of time here. Their toys looked worn, and the books seemed well-loved. Ben wondered what their room was like at her house. Ben stopped at the window nook, in shock of the frame that was displayed. The last picture he and Rey had together, from his graduation, which his mother sneakily captured, propped next to a picture of the babies. Ben longed to embrace her like they were in the picture, lifting her off the ground, heads buried in each other's necks. 

Ben didn't realize tears were forming in the corner of his eyes until he heard a _ding!_ from his phone. 

* * *

**unknown number:**

home now, twins are in bed. 

**Ben:**

Thanks for telling me. I look forward to hearing from you more. 

**Rey:**

the only time i get on my phone is when they're literally sleeping. 

how about this? you can ask me one question about the twins a day, and i'll answer after they're asleep.

**Ben:**

I'll take it. Anything else I can do for you or them?

**Rey:**

in time. i'll tell you when. goodnight, ben.

**Ben:**

Night, Rey. 

* * *

Over the next few days and weeks, life continued as usual. Ben went to work in the Loop. Rey and the babies enjoyed their summer before Rey started work at Resistance Engineering, conveniently located in Rogers Park, with Han and Leia's house on the way. The only difference or their routines were the addition of a text Ben sent in the morning, and the response Rey sent at night. 

* * *

**Ben at 7:28 AM:**

When did you find out you were pregnant?

**Rey at 8:49 PM:**

after i came home from the road trip.

* * *

**Ben at 8:00 AM:**

Who is older? Mae or Bail?

**Rey at 7:45 PM:**

bail was first, mae came 5 minutes later. 

* * *

**Ben at 9:21 AM:**

What were some of your cravings? Or things you couldn't stand?

**Rey at 8:49 PM:**

portillos chocolate cake with a drizzle of the melted cheese - gross, i know. 

i absolutely hated the smell of coffee. 

**Ben at 9:15 PM:**

You never liked coffee in the first place.

**Rey at 9:30 PM:**

more of a reason to avoid it ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

* * *

Over the next days and weeks, Ben was grateful for what had was given. He learned bits and pieces about the time when they weren't together.

Two years ago, if you asked Ben what he would do if he had kids, he would laugh at the idea. Slowly, the thought of dismissing his own children sat like a rock in his stomach. 

* * *

**Ben at 5:30 AM:**

Have you traveled with them?

**Rey at 5:35 AM:**

what are you doing up so early?

**Ben at 5:42 AM:**

I'm at O'Hare. There's a workshop in DC that I was asked to go to. It's a quick one, I'll be back tomorrow afternoon.

Why are you awake? I'd imagine you try to get all the sleep you can. 

**Rey at 5:45 AM:**

like i mentioned before, the only time i get to myself is when they're sleeping. i have about an hour and a half to work out and shower before it's twin terror time. 

**Ben at 5:50 AM:**

I'll let you have your time. I'm about to board, anyway.

**Rey at 5:52 AM:**

have a safe flight, ben. 

oh and

we flew to colorado during spring break. the loved the zoo in colorado springs. 

_ [image sent]  _

* * *

Rey sent a picture of her with the babies on her lap. There were stacks of pizza on the table in front of them and a gorgeous view behind them. 

She looked very happy, and Ben couldn't help but smile at the sight. 

* * *

_ [image saved to camera roll]  _

_ [image set as home and lock screen]  _

* * *

**Ben at 6:38 AM:**

Good morning, Rey.

Do the twins have any quirks?

**Rey at 7:20 AM:**

they've learned how to mess with me. 

mae will purposefully eat from my plate instead of hers.

bail likes to splash me when they're in the bath.

and they BOTH pretend to fight and cry, so i come running to them, and then they laugh at me

**Ben at 7:25 AM:**

They really are troublemakers, aren't they?

**Rey at 7:30 AM:**

twin terrors! (but i love them so much)

**Ben at 7:40 AM:**

You absolutely do. 

I have a breakfast to attend to, and then my flight back is at 2. 

Talk to you later?

* * *

Rey sat on the couch as Mae and Bail crawled around the living room, playing with their scattered toys. She hesitated with the message, typing and deleting, typing and deleting until she clicked the little blue arrow.

* * *

**Rey at 7:43 AM:**

do you need a ride back from the airport? we can come to get you and you can stay for dinner? maybe we can start acclimating them to you? 

but if you think you'll be tired, it's okay if you'd rather not. 

**Ben at 7:45 AM:**

I'd love that, Rey. 

If everything goes according to plan, I should be back around 4 at Terminal 5.

I can't wait to see you and the babies. 

**Rey at 7:48 AM:**

we'll be there!

neither can we. 

* * *

As it was Saturday, Rey had the whole day to tidy around the house, clean Mae and Bail's shared bedroom, and do all the laundry. During their nap, Rey showered and still had enough time to put on makeup. 

_I'm not doing this for him. It's for me._

To be painfully brutally honest, Rey looked forward to waking up and seeing his texts. As the days went on, the time spent thinking about the right answer increased. She got a rush of endorphins when she heard the _pop!_ notification in her messages, signifying his 'reaction' to her response.

_What does he do with my responses? Do they just live in the thread? Does he write it in a notebook? Or in his notes app? He's always preferred taking physical notes rather than digital._

Rey looked over to the clock on her phone. 

_3:00_

_An hour._

She had the perfect amount of time to wake the babies, get everyone dressed, into the car, and onto the expressway to the airport. 

_Okay, maybe I'm cutting it close. I had to wait for two years. A few minutes at the gate won't kill him._

Driving with the babies strapped in the back was one of Rey's favorite things to do as a mum. The mirror attachments on the headrests allowed her to peek back and get a glimpse into their babbling conversation. 

The traffic to O'Hare was typical for a Saturday afternoon in the summer. It was muscle memory for Rey to raise herself in her seat as she looked for her destination, a parking spot, or one of her friends waiting to get picked up. But she didn't need to look for Ben. He stood miles above everyone else, and despite their separation, she could always spot him.

Rey pulled into an open spot on the curb, unlocked the car, and popped the trunk open. He looked good. Slacks and a button-up shirt with the arms rolled up clung to his body as he rolled his small suitcase over. 

"Hi." He said, bending over to peek through the passenger side window.

"Hey," she smiled, "there's room in the boot for your suitcase."

Ben chuckled at her use of 'boot' instead of 'trunk,' never mind that she lived in the US since she was a teen. 

He used caution when he closed the trunk, not wanting to disturb the twins and make them cry the second he entered the car. 

"How was your trip?" Rey asked as she moved her bag from the passenger seat to the space in-between the car seats, babies still babbling about. 

Although their daily texts over the past month had been brief, the shocked, cold, and awkward air between them seemed to have melted away. 

"It was fine," Ben replied as he ducked into the car. "Typical work trip. FO sends me somewhere once or twice a month. Thanks for coming to get-"

Twin telepathy in full action, Mae and Bail roared at the top of their lungs, "mummumumumaa!" 

"Okay, okay, loves! We're about to go to the store." Rey said, directed at the babies, as she checked her blind spot and pulled onto the road. "It's pasta night, and we don't have any pasta at home. Do you mind if we stop at Mariano's?"

Ben looked into the rearview mirror and watched how the babies interacted with each other, stretching their chunky little arms to pass toys and books. "Not at all, I wasn't sure what you do on Saturdays."

The drive back to their neighborhood went by in a flash. The aforementioned awkward air between them felt comfortable and familiar with a pinch of caution.

Ben asked for expanded answers to some of the questions he had from their texts. 

"Why didn't you just give them your last name?"

"I wanted to honor your parents. They are their grandchildren, after all."

"Do you want to stay at the house in Winnetka?"

"Although I have two kids, I'm still a twenty-two-year-old who wants to live in the city. I might rent it out and move to Lincoln Park. I'm not a huge fan of the schools in Winnetka. Too many Karens."

"How are you working with Mae and Bail being so young?"

"Your parents live en route to my job, so they go with them Monday through Thursday during the day, and I work from home on Fridays. You know Resistance is flexible and understanding."

"Do they have allergies?"

"Not that I've noticed. They'll eat anything I give them, and we haven't had any problems yet."

Ben and Rey heard whines and kicking from the backseat. Instinctively, they both turned around once Rey pulled into the 'mother and baby' parking spot at the grocery store. 

"Can you grab a trolley while I get the babies out? One with two seats?"

Once again, Ben chucked at her British use of the word as he exited the car and ran to the corral. 

As he pushed the cart back, he overheard Rey coo and calm them down.

_She's always been so patient._

"Yes, yes, baby girl, you're coming out of your seat right now," she told Mae, as she walked her to the cart. Bail quickly grew tired of being restrained, the screeches of his voice said so. "I'm going to get you too, little boy!"

Ben stood to the side, staying out of Rey's way as she settled the twins into their seats. 

"You can come here, Ben. It's okay," Rey said as she pulled her reusable bags from the car. After she placed them in the trolley, she bent down to bring her head to their level, her face softened, showing the babies they can relax; and she waved, hoping they would copy her actions. "Can you two say hello?" 

Both Mae and Bail drew toothy smiles and waved their arms and gathered some babbles in greeting, "hieeeeee." Ben smiled and waved back, bending down slightly to not scare them with his massive height. 

"Are you all ready for some shopping?" Rey asked the group as she started to walk towards the entrance. "My goodness, it's hot out here, want to get some gelato inside?"

The twins clapped enthusiastically and yelled, "yay!"

_Let's do this._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading!
> 
> hooooly shit this chapter is long (for me)
> 
> i really enjoyed writing this chapter, i'm so glad we've moved on to a different day haha. 
> 
> i actually went to the zoo in colorado springs, and there's a restaurant in the zoo called "pizza with a view" and the pizza was delicious, and the view was AMAZING! if you have the chance, i'd suggest going there too! (but seriously, if you ever come to Chicago, you HAVE to go to Portillos.)
> 
> please let me know if you have any questions about this chapter. i love reading your feedback, it helps me stay on track with the story! (i hope the texts, page breaks, and jumps made sense - i'd be happy to change the layout if it's too much)
> 
> thank you, i love you, i hope you're doing well.


	8. i really am

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "UncaFi! UncaFi!" Mae squealed.  
> "Poe-Poe!" Bail yelled. 
> 
> "Mis conejitos!" Poe exclaimed as he ran towards nephew and niece. Finn, who was pushing their full cart, was not far behind. "Ben?" 
> 
> "Hey, guys! What are you doing out here?" Rey asked as she spooned the mini shovel into her mouth.
> 
> "I could ask him the same thing." Finn chided as he slid his cart parallel to Rey's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some things in this chapter that might need some explanation -
> 
> mariano's - large grocery store in the Chicagoland area that has a gelato bar inside (among other things)  
> mis conejitos - 'my little bunnies'

To anyone else looking on, they looked like the picture-perfect millennial family on the weekly shopping trip. In reality, it was a monumental day of firsts. 

The first time he's really been with Rey since he left.

The first time he's really meeting his children.

The first time he's spending the afternoon with any of his family.

Rey pushed the cart into the large grocery store, the babies' eyes blinked rapidly in shock of the cold air blowing at them, and they laughed together afterward. 

Ben had only known about their existence for barely two months, but that short time, they had grown to be his motivation to live. Even though he could simply observe from a distance. 

"Can I get a small Italian Vanilla and a..." Rey turned around to Ben, who stood away from the kiosk, staring at his feet. "You still like the Cappuccino flavor, right?"

He lifted his eyes scanned to the lit freezer with the pans of gelato. He cautiously stepped closer to the stand. "That'd be nice, thank you."

"And a small Cappuccino, please." Rey finished her sentence as she picked up the book the Mae dropped from the cart. It seemed like second nature for her to be multitasking because she reached to Bail, who was holding her wallet at the same time she lowered to the ground. She was able to pay the cashier and flip the page of their book like it was nothing. Ben could barely get dressed and brush his teeth without something going wrong. 

Speaking of multitasking, "Do you want to eat and push the cart while I feed them as we walk around?" Rey asked, handing Ben his cup of gelato. "Be careful they don't stick their sneaky little fingers into yours," she said, directed to the twins as she tickled their bellies, calling them out on their mischief. "They will if you turn your head for even a second." 

"UncaFi! UncaFi!" Mae squealed.

"Poe-Poe!" Bail yelled. 

"Mis conejitos!" Poe exclaimed as he ran towards nephew and niece. Finn, who was pushing their full cart, was not far behind. "Ben?" 

"Hey, guys! What are you doing out here?" Rey asked as she spooned the mini shovel into her mouth.

"I could ask _him_ the same thing." Finn chided as he slid his cart parallel to Rey's.

She shot her best friend a death glare because he knew exactly what was happening. After all, she called him on the way to the airport. 

* * *

"You invited him over to your house?! Are you sure about that?!"

"Yes, Finn, I know what I'm doing."

"Do you? If I'm not mistaken, he broke your heart and ruined your life."

"Excuse me! Mae and Bail are the best things that have ever happened to me, and you damn well know that." She spat, holding back tears as she thought about the unfortunate timing of the babies' birth and her grandfather's death. 

"I do, peanut. I just don't want to see you hurt again. You deserve better than him. The babies deserve better than him."

"I won't." Rey paused, "He's their dad. He had to know someday. It's shocking we didn't run into each other within the past two years." 

"Keep me updated on all this, will you?" 

"I will, Finn. I'm at the airport now, I gotta go." Rey quickly glanced in her rearview at the babies. "Say goodbye to UncaFi, babies!"

The twins yelled at the top of their little lungs, "ba-byeeee!!!!" 

"Love you guys."

"Love you too."

* * *

Rey fed Mae and Bail bites of their gelato. "Finn..." she grumbled, "we talked about this."

Finn brought his hands to the babies' heads, giving them a gentle, protective touch. "Oh, I know, I didn't think he'd actually follow through with his words."

Keeping his temper under wraps, Ben gritted out, "I'm trying my best here, Finn."

"Amor," Poe began, bringing a hand to his partner's back, "she can handle herself." 

She continued to feed the twins as they sat in the shopping cart, acting like they were in the conversation. "Thank you, Poe." 

"Mummummuma..." the babies whined. 

"Okay, bunnies, we'll let you go," Finn said to the babies. 

"Adios bebes," Poe said as he walked over to the babies and gave them kisses on the top of their heads. "Bye, Rey. Ben."

"Bye, Peanut!" Rey waved as the couple walked away. 

Ben took a big bite of his gelato and walked closer to the cart. "Should I get used to that?" 

"They've grown quite protective of the twins and I." Rey answered as she scraped the melted remains.

"I can tell... I can't blame Finn for feeling that way," he resigned. Ben reached out to take the now empty cup from Rey. The interaction mustered a smile between the pair. 

Although they were both done with their snack, they stuck to their earlier agreement, Ben pushing the cart, and Rey grabbing from the shelves. 

As they wandered through the store, the twins hardly noticed Ben pushing them instead of their mother. 

Obviously, Ben had little to no experience with children, but he recognized how well behaved the twins were in the store. Before today, he dreaded coming to the store, having to slip past arguing parents and children, drown out the noise of a tantruming toddler, and look past the spills of food in aisles. 

But Mae and Bail were two angels sitting right in front of him. They shared their board book without fights and kept their hands off the shelves, all while Rey reached for wraps of spinach, bags of puffcorn, a gallon of milk, and cans of tomatoes. 

"Ooooooh pashda," the twins said as they watched Rey drop a package of spaghetti into the cart. 

"No loves, it's 'past-a.'" Rey corrected.

Ben smirked, "do it again. Paaasta, pasta."

The twins repeated the word with the American pronunciation and giggled at their mother's displeased look. 

Rey rolled her eyes to Ben. "We can all agree, they're cute already, but can you just imagine them with British accents?" she said with her pitch rising to match the thought's cuteness. 

"Alright, fine. That would be extremely adorable," Ben agreed.

Rey smiled at her victory and lead them further through the store. Meanwhile, her little mini-me had other plans. 

Ben's large hands gripped the handle of the cart. Meanwhile, Mae's tiny hands played with his fingers, getting his attention.

"Yes, sweetheart?" He whispered to the baby girl under his breath.

She answered with a giggle that melted Ben's heart in its place, and she wriggled her way to holding his finger like she reached to do months ago. 

Regardless of her age, her hands would always be small in comparison to his. But all Ben could think about at the moment was how little she and her brother were when they were born.

He saw the pictures and the facts in the scrapbook, they were five, barely six pounds at birth. They looked like he could've held them solely in his hands. Ben's heart pounded in his chest from the guilt he felt. 

The sound of monotone beeping shook Ben back to reality, Rey was unloading the cart onto the conveyor belt. 

"Oh god," Rey groaned, digging into her purse. "Which one of you two did it?"

Immediately, Bail started to giggle. 

Rey pulled a diaper changing kit out of her bag. "Of course, it was you. You always have the right timing, don't you, Bail?"

"Rey, if you have to... go handle the situation, I can keep an eye on Mae and all this," Ben offered. 

She reached to pull Bail from the seat, "alright," she said, holding out her wallet with her free hand. "Here's my wallet, the pin is their birthday," she hustled over to the bathroom. 

"You're a lucky man," the older woman at the register said. "What a beautiful family you have there." 

Ben grew flushed at the compliment. The woman wasn't wrong, and he didn't have the heart to tell her wrong, so he accepted it. "I really am lucky. Thank you." 

"$68.42 is your total today," the woman said. 

Ben bent over to be eye-level with Mae, "can you hold your mama's wallet for me?" 

The little girl nodded and took the wallet from him, and then he followed the prompts on the card reader with his black Amex.

After all of the bags were back in the cart, they walked over to meet Rey and Bail. 

"All good?" Ben asked, propping one foot on the cart.

Rey adjusted the little boy on her hip, "yep, you guys good?" 

He nodded and smiled at Mae in the cart. 

"Good, let's go home, shall we?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> i sooo love this chapter. i realized i've been writing a lot of ben's perspective, so i'll try to focus on rey's next!
> 
> thank you for all the kudos and comments, i really appreciate them! i'd love to hear your feedback, thoughts, or questions. 
> 
> thanks again, i love you, i hope you're well. 
> 
> find me on tumblr @benwaitingforsolo


	9. trust in me when i say

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You did what?" Rey grabbed her wallet from the bench as she walked and held out cash.
> 
> "Don't, Rey." Ben held out a flexed hand, declining the bills offered to him. "I don't want your money. If anything, I should be giving money to you."
> 
> Her hands dropped to her sides. "I don't want your money either, Ben. I didn't ask you to pay for the groceries. I didn't ask for your help. I don't want your help."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sign language:
> 
> open hand moving in circular motion on chest - please  
> hands opening and closing into a fist - milk  
> fingers closed (like you're making a hand puppet?) and tapping together - more

"So, uh, I can carry the groceries while you get the kids?" Ben asked as Rey pulled into the driveway of her home. 

She reached to unlock the trunk, "I'd really appreciate that, Ben. Thank you." Rey paused as she stepped out. "The door code is September 25."

Rey could see that the date didn't ring a bell to Ben, her heart cracked the tiniest bit, but she didn't let it linger. "September 25?"

"The first day that you told me to be quiet in the library." 

"You saved the date?"

"Of course I did, Ben."

Ben hefted the bags while Rey carried a twin on each hip with her backpack-purse strapped over her shoulders. Ben hesitated at the front door as if he wasn't allowed inside, even though he had been at her grandfather's, now her house before. Many a time, Ben would come over during the summer for barbeques, stay the night when her grandfather would go out of town and stop by for breakfast on the weekends. 

"You know where the kitchen is. Go ahead."

Her home was the same as he remembered, only with a few changes. Like, the new color on the walls, updated flooring, and obvious baby-proofing design choices. The kitchen was different too. He remembered the countless times he had to force Rey off Pinterest so that they could go to bed. By the looks of it, she finally created her dream kitchen. The cabinets were white with glass windows. The countertops changed from gray granite to sleek, dark marble, all still with the stovetop range that her grandfather installed. 

Once she stepped through the threshold and closed the door with her foot, she lowered the babies to the ground. "Alright, you two. You know the drill, shoes off, and then you can play while Mummy is cooking."

"Tank you, Mumma!" Bail said as he yanked his shoes off his feet and bolted to their play area. 

Mae, on the other hand, neatly laid her shoes on the ground and crawled calmly to meet her brother. "Fank you, Mumma!

"I love you!" Rey sang as she walked past the soon-to-be toddlers to get to the kitchen.

In unison, the twins responded, "wuv you!"

Rey found Ben staring at the many pictures hung on the fridge. There were pictures he's seen before, like one of Rey and her grandfather before her first day of college, and recent ones, like the holiday cards that he could've been part of. Ben brought his hand to a photo of his parents holding the twins at a restaurant. 

Her purposeful breath turned Ben around. "Did you want to stay here with me to cook or go out there and play with them?" Rey asked as she filled a pot of water. 

"I think it's more important we figure ourselves out before I get involved with their lives." He turned and leaned his hips back on the island. "Yes, I came here for them, but I accepted your offer because I wanted to be with you. I also don't know how to play with one-year-olds."

She kept her back turned as she lit the stove. "Remember how to make the sauce?" 

"I still use the recipe when I'm home for dinner instead of at a business dinner."

Pasta night was a regular event when they lived together. Rey grew tired of bland, premade sauces from a can, so she learned how to make her own, and after she did so, it stuck as if it was written on the back of her hand. Ben's, too, as he was present for the trials. 

"I circumcised Bail."

"I'm glad you made that choice."

"They're going to go to public school, but I want them to go to a CPS school."

"I never liked the schools in this area anyway."

"I'm following the recommended vaccination cycles from the pediatrician."

"I knew you would."

"They're not walking yet. I see them want to try, I just feel so bad that they haven't gotten it yet." 

"From what I've read, babies reach milestones at different times, and it's okay.

Dinner was routine, the twins enjoyed their food and made a mess in the process. Additionally, Ben forgot about eating as he got lost in awe of Mae and Bail using Sign Language to communicate their wants and needs. 

Mae's hand moved in circles on her chest as she watched her mother serve Bail first. 

"I haven't forgotten about you, darling." 

Bail's hands shifted from an open palm to a clenched fist. 

"I'll get your milk, love."

Both twins used their two hands and tapped them together rapidly. 

"How are you two still hungry?"

Ben kept his distance to not interrupt their bedtime routine. He watched as Rey cuddled up with the twins and read them stories on the couch. He listened from the hallway as Rey gave them a quick bath. He made sure his phone was on silent as the three disappeared into the nursery. Even with Rey and the babies being a floor away, Ben could make out the singing of a whispered melodic lullaby. 

_ "I love you, baby, and if it's quite all right _

_ I need you, baby, to warm these lonely nights  _

_ I love you baby  _

_ Trust in me when I say _

_ I love you, baby, and if it's quite all right _

_ I need you, baby, to warm these lonely nights  _

_ I love you baby  _

_ Trust in me when I say." _

-

Ben sat on the couch in the living room, taking in the space. She chose a round coffee table instead of a rectangular one. He noticed the functional furniture, an ottoman that opens up to store toys, and a bench that serves as a low bookshelf for the babies to reach. 

He sat up as he heard slow shushing and a door close, followed by footsteps coming down the wooden stairs. 

"Do you have the receipt from the grocery store?" 

Ben paused, thinking about his next words carefully. "I took care of it."

Rey's brows furrowed. The gentle face she held quickly firmed. She pulled out her phone and looked through her bank app as she walked towards Ben.  _ No activity after Vero Gelato _ . "You did what?" Rey grabbed her wallet from the bench as she walked and held out cash.

"Don't, Rey." Ben held out a flexed hand, declining the bills offered to him. "I don't want your money. If anything, I should be giving money to you."

Her hands dropped to her sides. "I don't want your money either, Ben. I didn't ask you to pay for the groceries. I didn't ask for your help. I don't want your help." Louder than she knew to, she slammed the money on the table in front of Ben. "I've been doing just fine on my own. I don't want your help." 

"Then why am I here, Rey?" Ben asked calmly. "I told you I want to be involved in their lives. I thought that's what we were exploring today."

"Baby steps, Ben!" Rey cried. "You can't just be around and getting involved all at once." 

"And why not?!"

Looking Ben straight in the eyes, she said, "because I'm not ready for you. You left in one day, and I know better than to let you back in one."

"I care about you, Rey. I care about the twins."

Instead of sitting beside Ben, Rey sat in the Papasan chair. "If you really cared about me, then you would've said something when it mattered."

"They're my kids too. I'm allowed to contribute, aren't I?" Ben sat up straight like he was ready to stand. 

Rey wrapped herself in a throw blanket. "You're really not helping yourself right now."

"Then tell me what you want me to do!"

"I told you already, figure it out."

Ben groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. "How the fuck am I supposed to do that without pissing you off? How am I supposed to help you if you don't want help?"

'Figure. It. Out." The end of their conversation was clear. Rey looked disappointed and exhausted as she trudged up the stairs. 

After silently clearing his frustration, Ben called a taxi, rolled his luggage, let himself out, and went home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! sorry it took me a while to get this chapter out, i hit a block with where this story was going, but i think this conflict is good for them. (also, this allows us to have time pass once again.)
> 
> i'd love to know what you'd like to see next or what you thought of this chapter! also let me know if you have any questions!
> 
> thanks for reading, i love you, hope you're well :)


	10. he always knows what to say

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rey and ben stew on their recent discussion.

Rey sat at the window seat of her room, still wrapped in the blanket she wrapped herself in downstairs. She watched as Ben walked down the driveway, get in the taxi he hailed, and disappear into the late sunset.

It was only 8, not nearly as late as Finn or Rose would leave when they came over for dinner. He could've stayed longer. But she did it again, she pushed away someone she loved, someone who wanted to help her. And it hurt. 

-

"C'mon Rey! Leia and Han have the kids for the night, join us!" Kaydel pressed.

Rey was hesitant. The babies were 9 months old, Leia and Han finally convinced Rey to let the twins sleepover at their house, and as much as she wanted to go out for drinks, Something just told her to stay put.

"No, I'm alright Kay, I have a ton of laundry to do here, and I don't want to be stuck in the city if something happens."

Kaydel groaned, and Rey could tell she was rolling her eyes through the phone, "Nothing's going to happen, it's one night, and their house is 30 minutes from the bar!

"You know I'm still breastfeeding them, I can't go out like we did in over spring break in Myrtle Beach! It's a no. I'm staying at home."

"You don't have to drink with us, then. We miss you, it's been months since you came out with everyone!"

Annoyance ran through Rey's brain, angry that her one of her closest friends, who supported her through her pregnancy, was being so ignorant of her situation. "Newsflash: I had twins. They're the priority, I can't be selfish anymore." 

"You're such a buzzkill. Literally."

"Have fun tonight, Kay." Without a goodbye, Rey hung up the phone and slammed it on the counter. 

Rey soon realized her reaction was rash, and she called Kaydel in a crying fit, apologizing for her yelling. In fact, Kaydel also cried, feeling sorry for being ignorant of Rey's reality of being a mom. They later made up over a brunch playdate that included mimosas. 

-

She would have loved for Ben to stay, have a glass of wine, and talk about integrating him in their routine. Maybe he could come over for dinner once a week when he had the chance. Perhaps she could be willing to let him watch them for a few hours. Additionally, tell him about how he is written on Mae and Bail's birth certificate. 

But, that conversation would have to wait for another day. 

* * *

The next few days for Ben were tough. It bothered him. Rey wanted him to 'figure it out' with absolutely no prompting. Everything in his life, until now, had a clear answer. And at work, it showed. 

"Something seems to be bothering you, Solo. What's the matter?" Snoke asked once the conference room had cleared. 

Ben shuffled the files on the table and responded, "It's a personal matter, Sir. No worries." 

"It doesn't have to do with a certain girl, does it? If I remember correctly, her graduation was a few months back; the same graduation you spoke at." Snoke always knew, it was like he saw his mind, like he could see his every intent. Ben let it go as what made Snoke a wise superior. "Don't let her cloud your judgment, you've done well for yourself thus far."

The older man walked out of the room, leaving Ben to his own thoughts. At this moment, Ben had a feeling that Snoke's guidance wasn't what he needed. So, he went to the man who always knew what to say.

Without the distraction of Hux this time, Ben drove to his parents' house. Ben nearly slammed on the brakes as he spotted Rey's car pull out of the cul-de-sac and drive off, luckily, in the direction that wouldn't cross his. Although, he would not have minded seeing them again. He missed them. 

Seeing his father at the front entrance reminded Ben of when he'd come home after a party, waiting to reprimand him and tell him to not make the same mistakes. Ironically, this continued. 

"You just missed Rey and the kids," Han remarked as Ben stepped out of his car.

"I know, I just saw her drive by. She didn't mention me, did she?" 

Han held the front door open for his son, welcoming him home, "not that I heard, did something happen?" 

"I need your help, Dad." He admitted. 

"That's why I'm here, aren't I?" 

The father and son sat at the dining room table, where all important conversations in the Solo house took place. His mother announced she was running for re-election, where the trio had 'the talk' and right now, where his father gave the best advice he could. 

Like most father and sons do, Han and Ben would butt heads at every chance given. In light of recent events, Ben learned to listen instead of fight back, he learned to accept instead of deny. Because Han was his only hope. His parents knew his children more than he did, they spent most of their time with the twins, and in turn, with Rey.

"At first, she was determined to handle this on her own. But we all chip at her and help out, she deserves it." Han went on about Rey, about how she was comfortable on her own but needed to allow herself a break. All Ben could do was nod along. "If you're telling me that she didn't want your help in the moment, then do something that'll be meaningful in the long-run, whether it be for her or the kids."

"I haven't interacted with the twins, really. I don't know how to do that." Ben paused, taking in his lack of experience with children. "And I want to respect Rey's boundaries."

"You really show in them, you know?" Han chuckled and leaned back in his chair. "Makes me miss those moments with you running around at the old house. It's like I got a second chance for the times I wasn't around."

Ben smiled at his old man and asked, "Think I'll get a second chance?"

"I used to wonder that myself. But when the time is right, you'll know, son. Sometimes you have to do things that you know she'll get mad about. But it shows her that you care."

"Thanks, Dad, I'm sorry I came by without telling you." Ben apologized, "Should I wait until Mom comes home?"

Han waved his hand dismissively. "Don't worry about her, just give her a call sometime and drop by more often. That's all I'll ask of you." 

* * *

It took a lot longer for Mae and Bail to fall asleep, it's like they could tell something irked their mother. They wanted more cuddles, stories, and songs. How did they know that Rey needed some affection? 

After they finally want to sleep, Rey dropped on her bed. It would be at this point, Rey would check her phone and respond to Ben's question from the morning. 

_What are some things you do with them?_

_Do they watch TV?_

_What's their favorite food?_

But there were no unread messages, nothing, silence. 

She wanted to send a response. 

_They have a play-group every other week at the park district._

_Only the classics. None of that Paw Patrol bs._

_They love Mexican food. Taco Night at Poe's is their favorite. Remember when we used to go to those?_

But there was nothing to reply to. So, she laid in bed, looking at the picture she snuck of Ben and the twins at dinner last week. 

It was a picture of Ben holding out a fork with noodles twisted around it for Bail to eat, while Mae had a mouthful of her baguette. 

_ [image set as home and lock screen]  _

And it made her melt. This should not have been the first picture of Ben and the babies. He could've had ultrasound pictures, pictures holding her pregnant belly, photos from the birth, birthdays, and holidays. But they didn't, and she felt responsible for that. 

-

**Rey at 9:57 PM:**

i'm sorry

for everything

**Ben at 10:00 PM:**

You don't have to be sorry for anything, Rey.

**Rey:**

but i am. 

you should have known, you should have been there

i should have told you. 

thank you for getting the groceries

**Ben:**

I shouldn't have left you so abruptly. 

I would do anything to turn back time and be with you again. 

**Rey:**

_typing..._

**Ben:**

Before you say anything, can I call you? I want to run something by you before I do it.

**Rey:**

i'm all ears. 

-

Directly after Rey sent a text, her phone started to ring, and she answered quickly because she forgot to silence the ring. 

"Hi Ben." She greeted, almost giddy to hear his voice again. 

Rey could sense his smirk, "You're up late, are you doing okay?"

"The twins took a lot longer to go to bed, it's hard with only two arms."

"I can only imagine." Ben sympathized, wishing he could help her next time. "So, the reason I'm calling..."

"I'm listening."

"I want to set up accounts for the twins, you know, for college or whatever they'd like to do when they're older. Is that okay? I'll take care of everything." He asked, hoping for the best. 

Rey paused, hesitating with her answer, "That's huge, Ben. Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I'm in a position where I can help set my children up for success, please?"

"Then you have my permission to make them trust fund babies," Rey answered. Ben was lucky they didn't FaceTime; otherwise, she would have seen his celebratory action of pumping his fists in the air. "Is that it?"

"Oh, uh, no." Ben chose his words carefully, not wanting to take a step back after taking two steps forward. "There is one more thing. I'm sorry this call is all about money, but I want to give you a card."

Abruptly, Rey jumped in. "Absolutely not. I'm doing fine. I don't want your money."

Han's advice came into full swing. His father always knew what to say and when to say it. "Then don't use it for yourself. Use it for the twins. Buy their diapers and clothes when they need them. Realistically they're half mine, I want to pay my dues with them. That's what parents would do, right?"

Rey needed a deep inhale and exhale.

_It's alright. Let Ben help, let him in._

"Okay, but I will only use it on them," Rey answered. Ben pumped his fists in the air again. He was two for two. "And you're right, we should consider logistics and custody eventually."

_Custody._

That word triggered her, and he knew that. From moving from house to house, with that gross uncle of hers, to finally being with her grandfather, the idea of custody was a scary one. "Rey, I don't want to take them away from you. What you said before still stands, I won't be around 24/7 if you don't want me to be. It's up to you when I'm around them."

Ben heard a ragged sniffle come from the other end of the call, "Thank you, Ben. I- I'd love, the twins and I would love it if you came over when you get the chance. I could tell they enjoyed being around you the other day." She sounded relieved, "Don't make me go back on my words, but you know the code to the house, feel free to stop by whenever you'd like."

"That means so much to me, Rey. Thank-"

Rey heard sobbing come from the hallway. Mae and Bail were up again. 

"Ben, I'm sorry I have to go, they're up again. I think I'm going to let them sleep with me tonight. I-"

"Go to them, sweetheart. They need you." He really wanted to be there with her. 

Rey wiped her tears on her hands, "Let's continue this another day, can we?"

"I'd love to. Give the babies a kiss for me, will you?"

"I will. Goodnight, Ben."

"Night, Rey."

Although two crying babies were calling for her, Rey felt a wave of comfort. She swiftly went through her bedtime routine, taking her makeup off and changing into an oversized tee and sleep shorts, before carrying the babies into her bed. The three snuggled close, falling asleep calmly because everything was going to be okay. 

Once she was sure they had drifted again, she kissed her children like their father had asked her to. 

"Goodnight, sweethearts."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading!
> 
> i so so so appreciate all the comments and thoughts and ideas, they really help me develop this story of ours. keep them coming! i'd love to know what you thought of this chapter. also, please let me know if you have questions!
> 
> i love you so much. i hope you're doing well :)
> 
> ps: look forward to 🥞 🥞 🥞 🥞 because that's what i want to happen next. iykyk, yk?
> 
> okay love you bye!  
> here's my tumblr if you wanna come say hello: @benwaitingforsolo


	11. for the foreseeable future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> every sunday is pancake sunday in the kenobi household

If there was one thing that Ben confidently figured out on his own, it would be Rey's schedule. It was hung on the fridge, and he snapped a picture of it before she came into the kitchen. It reminded him of the planners she would fill in college, color-coded for different events, stickers representing holidays, and birthdays. She loved mapping out her schedule, but her favorite thing was a clear day, that meant doing absolutely nothing. Coincidentally, tomorrow had nothing planned, and Ben set his alarm for 6:30 and hoped Rey had all the ingredients for breakfast. 

On his early drive to their house, he realized she would, since every Sunday meant pancakes, and Rey never skimped on pancakes. 

* * *

The three stayed in bed much later than they normally would, especially for a weekend. Rey awoke with a foot in her face and a hand in her armpit, but she couldn't tell who's was who's. 

When she attempted to stir the babies, they groaned in protest. 

Rey teased the twins, "alright then, I guess I'll go downstairs by myself and eat all the Nutella."

Mae and Bail's heads popped up and started to shuffle off the bed. She laughed at their abrupt movement. "Okay, monkeys, let's go then."

The twins delightedly squealed, "yay yay yay!"

Ben heard movement from upstairs, he figured they had woken up and were headed downstairs. As he expertly flipped the pancake, he heard, "we have nothing planned today, why don't we work on walking, so I don't have to carry you two down the stairs again."

Ben heard the twins respond in unison, "okay mumma!"

He missed them. 

"I know I said come over whenever you can, but i didn't mean literally the next morning." Ben turned his head to see Rey, again holding the twins on her hips. 

"I know. You sounded like you were having a tough night last night, I wanted to make this morning easy for you."

Maybe it was the relief of not having to cook or the fact that he was back, but Rey's face softened as she put the twins in their seats. "That's very kind of you, I appreciate it. Are you staying?"

Ben replied as he slid the pancake on the stack of other finished ones. "For as long as you'd like me to." 

_In that case, stay for a long while._

* * *

To anyone driving past, it was a young neighborhood family relaxing in the backyard. Realistically, it was. Everyone, hand in hand, waddling side to side around the yard. 

Maybe it's the thing about siblings, especially twins. It's always a competition to be better than the other and trying to keep up. 

Despite being the second born, Mae was first to take her steps. Waddling into Rey's arms, falling into kisses on the grass. 

"Well done, my love! I'm so proud of you!" Rey enveloped her daughter into her arms as the boys watched from meters away. Bail's tiny hand gripped on to Ben's finger as they practiced. "Be a good girl and cheer on your brother, will you?" Rey suggested, squeezing tight on the baby girl. 

Mae responded by clapping enthusiastically. Meanwhile, Rey laughed at how far Ben had to bend over to hold the baby boy's fingers. 

In such a short time, the twins grew incredibly comfortable with Ben. They allowed him to wipe them up after breakfast, hell, they devoured his breakfast. As Rey cleaned up in the kitchen, he settled on the ground and played with them. It was like he didn't want to waste any more time. 

Bail grew particularly fond of Ben, finally spending more time with another boy. "Ready, little man? I'm right here, walk to mama," Ben encouraged, leading them towards the girls. Step by step, the pair went from holding two fingers, to one finger, to solo walking. "Almost there!"

Rey opened her arms wide like she did for Mae as Bail trekked closer and closer. She smiled when she noticed the focused look on her son's face, it reminded her of Ben's focus face. "Look at you go, Bail!" She gave the same monstrous kisses to the little boy as she did his sister. "Daddy did a great job helping you to walk, didn't he?"

* * *

"We can read one more story, but you two have to go to bed!"

The twins could not bear to be away from each other, even as they slept. To cope with that, Rey set their cribs on opposite walls, with a small couch in between. This way, they could see each other through the rungs and still get a good night's sleep. It was also handy for bedtime, as Rey didn't have far to go to lower them into their bed. 

When Rey read to the babies, she sat in the middle with a twin on either side. Tonight, the parents sat side-by-side with a twin on their lap, squished together on the futon. 

Rey bounced the little boy on her lap, making him giggle with joy. Utilizing their new skill of walking, Rey lowered Bail onto his feet to waddle over to the bookshelf. "Go pick a book!"

Using all the strength he had, Bail pulled a book from their small library. He trudged back and lifted it up for Ben to grab. 

_That mischievous boy._

Bail held out "Your Baby's First Word Will Be 'Dada'" by Jimmy Fallon. 

As if the twins planned, Mae scooted over to Rey so Bail could sit with Ben and his book of choice. 

"Is this okay with you?" Ben asked as he lifted Bail onto his lap. 

Rey's cheeks grew flushed as she answered, "It's their favorite book, they think the animal noises are hilarious."

"Please please please please, pweeeease!" The twins begged, squirming their bodies around for attention. 

"Alright, you two. He'll read you the story, but you have to do the animal noises. Deal?"

Mae and Bail nodded excitedly as Ben started to read.

"Dada."

"Moooo!"

"Dada."

"Hee-Haw!"

"Dada."

"Tweet-tweet!"

Once the twins settled into their beds, and their white noise machine was on, Ben and Rey tip-toed out of their rooms. "Goodnight loves." She said, just before she closed the door. 

"That was harder than I expected," Ben whispered as he leaned his back in the hall wall. 

Rey released the scrunchie from her hair, letting the chestnut waves free from her mini bun. "Tonight was relatively easy since you were here." 

The hall was dark, to not let light through the crack under the door and wake the twins. Despite the lack of light, Ben got lost in Rey's eyes. They were tired, must be from her drastic change of lifestyle. But, they were soft and warm with all the care she shares with the babies.

"If you'd let me, I'd love to come by more often. You know, help you with dinner, give them a bath, put them to bed." Ben offered, as Rey lead him down the stairs. 

Rey stopped at the landing and turned around quickly. "Are you sure? We're so out of the way from downtown. You don't need t-"

"Rey," Ben interrupted, holding his arms out in surrender. "I want to. It doesn't matter how far I have to drive. I love being with the twins, and I love being with you. Please, let me do this."

"I love being with you too."

* * *

The next day, Ben sent a notice through his office.

"For the foreseeable future, I will be leaving the office promptly at 6PM. I will not be available for after-hours communication. Please do not contact me with your concerns about my schedule, Hux."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello there!
> 
> i'm so sorry this took so long! i've been so occupied with work and i had trouble writing this chapter. 
> 
> i would love to know your thoughts and i so appreciate you for reading something i've created. please let me know if you have questions about the ‘plot.’
> 
> thanks again for reading, i hope you're doing well :)


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